5 tried and tested ways to effectively control your anger

In the realm of Islam, anger is believed to be one of the most lethal of emotions. It is an emotion that is driven by the whispers of satan, leading man to commit heinous acts and perpetuate evil. In Islam, we are warned of the repercussions of dwelling in an angry state and letting it overpower us. If we let it, it can consume us and lead us to self-destruction and terrible outcomes.

The onset of anger takes advantage of the very nature of humans and brings out the worst version of an individual. It has the tendency to make one lose all sense of self-control and surpass all mediums of rational thought. This results in a person engaging in words of profanity, curses, kufr and undesirable acts. Anger has the potential to sever family ties, bonds of friendship and inviting new enemies.

Therefore, it becomes paramount to acknowledge the reality of anger and the potential havoc it can create in a person’s life. There is a reason our Holy Prophet (PBUH) constantly emphasized the need to harness your anger and gain control over it.

Abu Hurairah (SAW) reported that a man came to the Prophet (SAW) and said: “Advise me.” He said: “Do not become angry.” The man repeated his request several times, and each time the response was, “Do not become angry” (Sahih Bukhari 10:465).

These prophetic words hold great benefits and meaning for the ummah because its implementation would prevent people from having angry outbursts and lashing out unnecessarily. Anger can often result in inflicting harm on the other party. Hence, here are a few tried and tested techniques for cooling off your anger.

1.Seek refuge from satan and recite ta’wwudh

If you feel yourself getting angry, recite “Audhu billahi minashaytan nirajim (I seek shelter in Allah from satan ,the rejected)” with meaning. This is a cure, which was practiced by the Holy Prophet (PBUH) himself.

Sulayman ibn Sard said: "I was sitting with the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), and two men were slandering one another. One of them was red in the face, and the veins on his neck were standing out. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, ‘I know a word which, if he were to say it, what he feels would go away. If he said "I seek refuge with Allaah from the Shaytaan," what he feels (i.e., his anger) would go away.’" (Sahih Bukhari  6:337)

2.Stay silent

A very good technique of gaining control over your anger is to remain silent. No matter how difficult it may seem at the time of confrontation and the onset of anger, gear your mind and body towards maintaining silence. This is because one can lose self-control and say things he/she doesn’t mean in the spur of the moment and will come to regret it later on. These words usually prove harmful to the other party in one way or the other. According to the Prophet (PBUH):

“Teach others, make things easy and do not make things difficult. When one of you is angry, he should remain silent” (Musnad Ahmad 2137).

3.If you are standing, sit. If you are sitting, lie down

The Prophet (PBUH) gave another cure for anger; on the onset of anger, take a moment and focus on your bodily position; if you are standing, take a seat and if you are already sitting, lay down has advised it. There is a science behind this as well; According to the Prophet (PBUH):

“If one of you is angry when he is standing, let him sit down so that the anger will leave him. Otherwise, let him lie down” (Sunan Abī Dāwūd 4782).

If you are in a standing position, you are more likely to move about and cause harm or lash out. If you are sitting or lying down, your chances of lashing out decrease. Sitting and lying down may just prevent the person from doing something he/she might regret later on.

4.Make dua

Dua and supplication are one of the greatest weapons for a Muslim. Call upon Allah (SWT) to protect you from all things evil, and seek His refuge from deeds carried out in anger. Seek His refuge from falling into acts that may cause you regret and cause harm to others in a state of anger. Moreover, if you call upon Him, have faith that He will respond. It is only He who has the power to help us, hence, constantly supplicate and make Dua that Allah (SWT) protects you from situations of anger and regret.

5.Take a moment and remind yourself that your endurance will be rewarded by Allah (SWT)
 
Allah (SWT) takes into account all of our acts, no matter how small. Even if you control yourself in a moment of anger, Allah (SWT) notes it and promises a reward for it.

“And hasten to forgiveness from your Lord and a garden as wide as the heavens and earth, prepared for the righteous. Who spend [in the cause of Allah] during ease and hardship and who restrain anger and who pardon the people - and Allah loves the doers of good” (Quran 3:133-134)

Take a moment to remind yourself that Allah (SWT) has promised great and endless rewards to those believers who control themselves in moments of anger and do not let it overcome them.

"Whoever controls his anger at the time when he has the means to act upon it, Allaah will fill his heart with contentment on the Day of Resurrection." (Saheeh al-Jaami 6518).

Anger may be the one of the main and most common of emotions among humans, but that does not mean you let it rule you and your actions. Be mindful and be patient when it comes to things, which may elicit feelings in anger in you and constantly remind yourself about its lethal repercussions and the regret it leaves behind. To have control over your anger is a greater strength than one realizes.
 
Abu Hurairah reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace, and blessings be upon him, said:
“The strong are not wrestlers. Verily, the strong are only those who control themselves when angry” (Sahih Muslim 2609).